Kalamazoo Harpy Reports

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Current Harpies

Master Harpy:
Perry Metcalfe, Brujah

Lesser Harpy:
Marion Tuttle, Toreador

Contact NPC at arst.masq.cai@gl.mindseyesociety.org.

Harpy Reports

Most recent reports at the top.

November 7, 2013

To all Kindred who concern themselves with court affairs in Kalamazoo:

As of a meeting of the Primogen Council of Kalamazoo before dawn today, November 7, 2013, the Brujah no longer have a seat on the Council in this city. Additionally, Marion Tuttle has been removed from the position of Mistress Harpy of Kalamazoo. In her place, I, Perry Metcalfe of Clan Brujah, have been appointed Master Harpy of this client domain of the Michigan Imperium. As a final note in this report, Primogen Elaine Bruun of Clan Toreador has promised me a major prestation before the Council in exchange for my consent to take on her childe Marion Tuttle as my Lesser Harpy, which I did in the same meeting.

Otherwise, winter comes, and with it, the Lupines. I have recently recovered from a run-in with them myself. This is not a joke, metaphor, or any other form of rhetorical device. Beware when traveling in the wilds between the client domains of this Imperium.

Best regards,
Perry Metcalfe
Master Harpy, Kalamazoo

October 10, 2013

Though it be the death of the proverbial cat, honored ladies and gentlemen of the Camarilla, curiosity is what separates us from the dust and clay of the earth, is it not? Such is the nature of our nights here in Kalamazoo, and to have it otherwise would be tiresome. And so without further ado, allow me to whet your ravenous appetites for news with an account of the affairs in Kalamazoo, a client state of the Michigan Imperium, led by the fearless and well-known Imperial Prince Mircea De Luna, Elder of Clan Malkavian, whose childe Robert DuBois we are so fortunate to have as our local sovereign.

As many of you know, Duke DuBois of Kalamazoo recently called court at the famous Henderson Castle bed and breakfast on the evening of Wednesday, September 25. The night began perfectly, the lawn of the castle lit by Japanese lanterns and the guests enjoying the warm air of the evening together. And what guests we had! From far and wide -- Virginia, Puerto Rico, Oregon -- the court of Duke DuBois was quite the event!

When the castle was open to admit the guests, most of the party moved into the castle's well-known ballroom, where the majority of the night's entertainment was provided by our very own lovely Elaine Bruun and her versatile voice. Surely, the Rose contingent was struck by her skill and the passion she shared by means of her enchanting voice, which we are so fortunate to enjoy locally on many a night.

Aside from musical entertainment, the guests themselves were quite stunning, both in word and in dress. One star of the night was Eleanor von Spaichingen of Clan Tremere, who asked me for some tips about her new post as Harpy in the domain of Fredericksburg, Virginia, where she is charged by her primogen -- of whom there are but few, but that's no worse than the United States House of Representatives and its dearth of parties now, is it? -- to keep the court civilized. She asked me for advice, and so I told her then, "I believe that one should have a sharp tongue and entertaining views," when one is a Harpy, and I still endorse those words. But now I offer Harpy von Spaichingen of Fredericksburg another piece of advice: When you tell a Harpy in court -- in public, note -- that you are "green around the ears" in your position, you make multiple errors. First, you horribly maim metaphorical idioms such that I can only understand you to be both wet behind the ears, that is, inexperienced, and green around the gills, that is, looking sick. Since her self-expression was so mangled at the time, I am left quite confused as to her actual state, and so I can only take from her lack of eloquence that she is ambiguously green, in the sense of new, or was it nauseous? Ladies and gentleman, you see the problem. I only hope that the Kindred of Fredericksburg do not often need to rely upon Harpy von Spaichingen for clarity. Except, of course, when it comes to her opinions of others, as you will soon see.

I presume, that clarity of expression is hardly among Fredericksburg's top concerns at this time, thanks to the most informative Mr. Laszlo Bako, an Elder of Clan Brujah from Portland, Oregon who attended our court with his childe Eileen Vargas that evening. Of course, I would not know a whit about Fredericksburg's current troubles but for Elder Bako and his most direct nature, for he approached Harpy von Spaichingen and followed up his most acceptable opening, "And how fares the fine domain of the ever lovely Prince Bellamy?" with the most pointed of questions, "Are the hunters still an issue?"

How awkward. But I was reminded of black face crows singing about Dumbo the Flying Elephant when Harpy von Spaichingen replied without missing a beat that the hunters hadn't yet gone away. How inconsiderate of those hunters to overstay their welcome, I thought, just briefly, before realizing how jauntily and quickly Elder Bako and Harpy von Spaichingen had just indicted the court of Prince Adeline Bellamy! This, of course, before continuing by stating baldly about one "Elise," who is apparently charged with tracking down these hunters, the following verdict: "I don't think she's doing a very good job personally." Green indeed, Harpy von Spaichingen. Green indeed. But surely the new Harpy would not have been so off balance in those moments if Elder Bako had not been so indelicate as to launch into conversation with such a topic as if to make it his new, "Hello!" and expose the extreme and uncontained hunter problem of Fredericksburg, Virginia while attending our court. Surely, the elder was well aware that he would be overheard so glibly calling the stability of a Ventrue's praxis into question. The beautiful irony of this is that in the Lakes-Missisippi Heartland, especially in Michigan, it's Clan Brujah whose stability of praxis is traditionally in question.

But let us not be vindictive; instead, let us redeem those who have contrite hearts. For example, our own Brujah Primogen Perry Metcalfe, who fled the battlefield in 1967 and could be said to be outliving his lease on life by existing still today while the Clan Giovanni rules Detroit, was recognized for his longevity that night. Indeed, it seems that this was the big news of the night. Duke DuBois wanted to make sure that everyone recognized how special it is for one of our own to come of age after half a century among us. Thus, we all bore witness to how Primogen Metcalfe has become quite established in our society. Perhaps Elder Bako was actually looking to distract the court's attention from his local primogen to the skeletons in Prince Bellamy's closet, so as to get us focused on Clan Ventrue rather than Clan Brujah that night.

As I said, there were some stars in terms of dress on that night. Notable among our guests was Jack Mitchel of Clan Tremere, Seneschal of Mt. Pleasant, the seat of our imperium, whose black trousers and fine, dark blue silk shirt with frog closures and mandarin collar were quite striking. Mr. Mitchel's reputation for dress precedes him in the Michigan Imperium, and it turns out that our esteemed Duke thought Mr. Mitchel to embody the most peregrine spirit of a philosopher and dapper dresser both in one heart, and he was quite taken with him, such that he told me himself the next night and bid me share his opinion.

But others caught our duke's eye as well. In the same conversation with me, Duke DuBois made clear to me that in his venerated opinion, no matter what I might think of her, he found Eleanor von Spaichingen's attire, a sheer Temperley London silver and gold sequin gown, quite nice. Furthermore, he expressed how he thought her quite alluring, and he hopes that she will visit his city again. Finally, Duke DuBois was quite taken with the beauty afforded his city by the Clan Toreador on that night, and I can't say that I blame him. For among our honored guests was Veronica Devries, Clan Toreador, Sheriff of Mt. Pleasant, whose garnet-hued, high-low ball gown by Monique Lhuillier caught the eye of the court. Sheriff Devries is known for her generally more casual and reserved attire, and so when she donned this special gown for our duke's court, he greatly appreciated the gesture. Indeed, as he understands the Roses' ideals, he thinks she warrants his personal commendation, or as he put it, "The Roses want exactly what she is: fetching beauty. Her gesture to me and my court will be cherished."

Clearly, we can see where Duke DuBois's mind was that night. Do I really need to state how transparent his motivations for extending patronage have become? Alluring and fetching... indeed.

I suppose it should not go unremarked that the Clan Giovanni showed up to court in force. How interesting it was to see them applaud for Primogen Metcalfe's victory of longevity and redemption since the time of his youthful error in Detroit. Some moments truly are unique, even for the long-lived.

I would report that Servire Zoe De Medici had been prominent among Duke DuBois's guests, except that just when he came forth to address his guests, she was nowhere to be found. At least she was able to join him afterward on the rooftop hot tub deck for a private conference. Hopefully her husband won't mind.

I now draw attention to two precious moments of that night (aside from every moment during which Primogen Elaine Bruun of the Rose sang for us).

Precious Moment in Kalamazoo #1:
When Rags, Boston's current Keeper of Elysia and historically Detroit's first Sheriff, gave the most quotable quote of the night:
"It is with Steel and Ink that the Tower is protected."

Indeed, this line, once it reached Duke DuBois's ears a few nights later, nearly brought a tear to his eye, for, as he told it, "This Nosferatu's words remind me of my sire, whose beloved childe I always hope to remain. Indeed, I find the words and deeds of this Kindred called Rags, as I learn more of them, inspiring to our cause here in Michigan, where we hold the line against the horde in Little Venice."

Of course, for every gentle reader and Camarilla patriot receiving this, there is at least one Schadenfreude enthusiast, and thus I present Precious Moment in Kalamazoo #2, when Lillian of Grand Rapids shared something of herself:
"I hail from Grand Rapids. How about yourself? I already like you better than some other Harpies I've met. The Harpy from my city dubbed me a heathen. Maybe that's how I should introduce myself. 'Lillian the Heathen.'"

Priceless.

For Lillian of Grand Rapids, Michigan, I reproduce a pearl by Shakespeare, from Hamlet, Act III, Scene II:
"The lady doth protest too much, methinks." Take it in Shakespeare's sense or in the modern sense, for both work in their own ways.

And with these precious gems to inspire warm and cutting smiles, respectively, I bid you citizens of the Camarilla adieu.

Most pleasantly,
Marion Tuttle
Clan Toreador
Harpy of Kalamazoo

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